Why did the 9-foot alligator cross the road?
For any reason it wanted to, thank you very much.
It’s not readily apparent if a gator is male or female, says Game Warden Todd Long, and there weren’t any particular clues to go-by as Sunday night turned into Monday morning in the dark of Hwy. 271 across from Tele’s Mexican Restaurant.
“There’s a way to test that, but I wasn’t about to do that last night,” he quipped later Monday, June 2. “We were just happy to get him out of there as quickly as we could.
“I’ll tell you now, but I wouldn’t have admitted to it last night: I was secretly a little bit terrified.”
That’s the wise man’s reaction when you’re staring into the steely black gaze of a prehistoric throwback.
For what it’s worth, June 1 is national Dinosaur Day. Long and the night shift personnel at Gladewater Police and Fire now have their own “terrible lizard” story to relate for years to come.
This week’s reptile wrangling originated from a motorist contact to GPD who got Long on the line post-haste.
“They reached out to me because it’s not something they encounter every day,” Long said. “I live just a mile or two from Gladewater. We’ve got a great relationship and help each other out on the different specialties of our jobs.”
It’s not his first rodeo, but this particular incident did produce some gnarly challenges – the spooked critter had pinned itself against a wrought-iron fence.
“The working space was pretty tight,” Long recalled. “There was nowhere for him to go or for me to get out of the way. It was either the fence or my leg or a diesel coming down 271.”
A rough estimate on scene put the American Alligator (Alligator mississippiensis) at 9-feet, 2-inches – and then some.
“He felt like he was a million pounds. The pictures don’t do it justice. He was so heavy and angry,” Long said. “It took four of us to get him up on my tailgate.”
Fortunately, Gladewater’s emergency responders didn’t shy from the task, even at midnight. In addition to handling traffic control, waving on rubber-necking motorists, the local personnel helped the game warden tape up the beast and – eventually – get it stowed.
“He was right there inches from the lane of traffic,” Long said. “I let him tire himself out after 30 minutes of wrestling and death-rolling. We finally got him into the truck to keep the peace and the public well-being.
“It was a tight, tight situation, pretty dangerous and stressful at times, but I went back to my training, and we got it taken care of. ”
Had it been daytime, he added, it would have been a totally different story – more traffic, more onlookers, the gator likely more aggravated, risky for everyone involved.
“I can’t give them enough credit, putting themselves in harm’s way. Especially the police officers. They went hands-on right from the start.”
It’s good practice for future incidents, too.
“There are lots of alligators in and around Gladewater, more and more nowadays. Healthy population,” Long noted. That said: “There’s nothing to panic about. They’re here. We know they’re here. Just keep a healthy distance.”
The original caller did the right thing, and all the personnel involved did what they had to do to ensure everyone’s safety, including the gator’s.
“In situations like this, call it ‘exigent circumstances,’ whether it’s in your living room or your front porch, just give the game wardens a call,” Long added. “One of us will show up 24/7 to get those things safely relocated.
“He was released to his natural habitat in the Sabine River. He happily swam away, came back up, looked at us a couple of times and went on downstream. Saying ‘thank you’ for getting him back home.”
Or, maybe, ‘See you later, alligator.’
